7 Tips to Help You Survive a Divorce
If you are looking a getting a divorce, you are not alone. Every 60 seconds two couples in the United States get a divorce. If you are facing this, there are some things you can do to make the process easier to get through. There is even legal aid for divorce, if you think you need that.
- Find a divorce lawyer. Even if you think you will be filing uncontested divorce, getting help from an attorney can make a big difference in your outcome. If you are concerned about the cost of the divorce or the divorce lawyer, you can look into getting legal aid for divorce. Your lawyer can help you understand the process, learn your rights and make the whole thing a lot easier. Whether you need legal aid for divorce or not, you should, at the very least, talk to a divorce lawyer. Even if you do not think you need a divorce lawyer, they can give you advice and insight that can help.
- Talk to your friends. You probably know someone who has been through a divorce. When you want to choose a divorce lawyer or if you are looking for legal aid for divorce, talk to the people in your life who you trust. You may not go with the same lawyer but they can give you some names and help you find the right attorney to help with your divorce.
- Talk to a therapist. Getting a divorce is one of the most stressful things in a person’s life. Experts rank it along with moving and losing a job in terms of the stress it places on a person’s life. You will need to talk to someone about your feelings and what you are going through. It may be tempting to spend your time with your lawyer venting about your situation but you would be better helped by going to a professional therapist to help you through the process. You will have a much better experience if you take care of your mental health during this hard time.
- Consider getting counseling for your children. If you have children, you should make sure you communicate everything that is happening with them. Even if they are very young, they will know something is going on and the whole situation can be very confusing and even scary. You can make it a lot easier for them if you are open and honest and keep them informed. You should also be careful about what you say about your spouse to and around your kids. Do not say bad things, even if they tell you that your spouse has said bad things about you. A therapist may be able to help them get through the divorce process a lot easier.
- Talk to your accountant. You need to know what your tax liabilities are and how the divorce will impact your finances. You should pay to get professional help for this. You may think you can do it all yourself but that can end up costing you a lot more in the end.
- Be realistic. When you go into the divorce process, you need to remind yourself that there are no winners in a divorce. You may be angry. You may have very valid reasons for that anger but you have to make sure you are ready and willing to make some compromises. If you are hell bent on destroying your spouse, you will end up elongating the process and make it harder for yourself. This is another reason getting a therapist is so helpful. They can help you process your anger, disappointment and any sadness so that you can approach the process with a more level head and not from an emotional place.
- Know what you really want. There may be things that you really want to get out of your divorce, such as custody of the children or ownership of the home. There may be things that you would like to get but are not deal breakers. Spend time thinking about what you must have and what you might like to have and you will be in a better position.
No one wants to get a divorce but you will get through yours.